There's a lot less that Spencer can complain about when Joel is pulling him close again, when Joel's high is right there against the arousal he can't hide, and even though he fakes a pout when at Joel's question, it doesn't last long. "Moderately better," he grumbles, biting back a yelp as a receding wave splashes against his back and shoulders. He gazes out past Joel's shoulder at the dark horizon and somehow, he finds it more comforting than when he looks out at the ocean in the light. It's vast out there, seemingly endless, and Spencer remembers when he'd first arrived in Siren Cove as a child. He'd asked his mother what would happen if he ever got lost out in the water, if there'd ever be hope of finding a way back home. She'd merely smiled, kissed his forehead and told them there's nowhere he could go that would keep her from finding him. Of course, he'd nearly drowned on one of his first attempts to swim out on his own so even as an adult and at Dane's goading, he hasn't spent much time in the water since then.
He's kept his distance from people for a long time because the less rational part of him has always held onto that, the inadvertently broken promise his mother had made to him over twenty years ago, but he knows why he's in the water with Joel right now. It hadn't just been the temptation of seeing Joel naked on the beach, though that hadn't been a demotivator; it's the fact that, as he's been saying since the beginning, Joel's the one who's been there to find him. Outside of the library during the Hydra attack, in the water with Cosette and the creature, at the lighthouse with Mark--Joel has always been there, a common denominator, a steady presence that Spencer knows he can no longer do without.
By the time he brings his attention back to where he is, where they are, he realizes that they're just about to tread water and a small part of him panics. He tenses, flailing a bit as he feels his feet reaching for the sand and moving his arms from around Joel's waist to over his shoulders. He knows he has nothing to be afraid of with Joel here but Spencer feels a distinct lack of control when it comes to floating in the water. There's nothing to grip, nothing to keep him afloat, it's only himself and he isn't sure how much he trusts himself to be able to kick his legs and moves his arms and keep himself from breathing in salt water all at once. He knows it's silly, he's a bit embarrassed that he lives in a coastal town and still can't swim at twenty-nine, but it's just never seemed very important.
"Don't let go of me, okay?" It's not quite a question, Spencer knows Joel won't let go unless he says it's okay, but his heart is practically pounding out of his chest as he tries to take a deep breath to steady him against the small waves. He shakes his head before giving Joel a sheepish smile. "I'm sure you're regretting this already."
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He's kept his distance from people for a long time because the less rational part of him has always held onto that, the inadvertently broken promise his mother had made to him over twenty years ago, but he knows why he's in the water with Joel right now. It hadn't just been the temptation of seeing Joel naked on the beach, though that hadn't been a demotivator; it's the fact that, as he's been saying since the beginning, Joel's the one who's been there to find him. Outside of the library during the Hydra attack, in the water with Cosette and the creature, at the lighthouse with Mark--Joel has always been there, a common denominator, a steady presence that Spencer knows he can no longer do without.
By the time he brings his attention back to where he is, where they are, he realizes that they're just about to tread water and a small part of him panics. He tenses, flailing a bit as he feels his feet reaching for the sand and moving his arms from around Joel's waist to over his shoulders. He knows he has nothing to be afraid of with Joel here but Spencer feels a distinct lack of control when it comes to floating in the water. There's nothing to grip, nothing to keep him afloat, it's only himself and he isn't sure how much he trusts himself to be able to kick his legs and moves his arms and keep himself from breathing in salt water all at once. He knows it's silly, he's a bit embarrassed that he lives in a coastal town and still can't swim at twenty-nine, but it's just never seemed very important.
"Don't let go of me, okay?" It's not quite a question, Spencer knows Joel won't let go unless he says it's okay, but his heart is practically pounding out of his chest as he tries to take a deep breath to steady him against the small waves. He shakes his head before giving Joel a sheepish smile. "I'm sure you're regretting this already."